Weathering Life's Storms: How can we maintain balance?

Feeling overwhelmed by one big problem? As a clinical psychologist, I often see how a single issue, for example a crisis at work or a relationship problem, can overshadow all the good things in life, leading to severe psychological distress, disconnection, and depression.

The key to preventing this "emotional capsizing" is adopting the principle of the oil tanker:

The Tanker Metaphor: An oil tanker isn't built with one large holding tank. If it were, the liquid cargo would slosh wildly in rough seas, creating an imbalance that would cause the ship to quickly capsize. Instead, it uses multiple, watertight compartments to contain the load, ensuring that if one area is compromised or the cargo shifts, the rest of the ship remains stable and afloat.

Your Life is an Oil Tanker

Your life, like an oil tanker, can be said to be comprised of multiple compartments, such as family, friends, health, work, hobbies, and personal growth. Allowing one problem to consume your entire focus is like operating with a single tank—the emotional "sloshing" of that one issue undermines your overall stability. To maintain your balance and stability, you must intentionally focus on, protect and connect with your healthy compartments.

Our Resilience Anchor

So how can we maintain stability and balance when experiencing a major problem in one area of our life? One way is through connecting with the small, daily acts that bring us contentment, connection, and joy:

• Keep doing the small things you love. That peaceful morning walk, a mindful cup of coffee, or a brief chat with a neighbour are not trivial. They are your emotional anchors, providing structure and reminding you that there is more to your life than this problem.

• Acknowledge the problem and come up with a plan to address it, but refuse to become obsessed by the problem. By focusing on and nurturing your healthy areas in life, you draw strength and maintain the necessary balance to navigate the storm.

Don't let one problem sink your ship. Draw strength from the many compartments in your life, and you can weather the problems in life with greater courage.

To learn more about this, you read our article on Compartmentalising

If you are having problems maintaining your psychological balance when experiencing problems in life, therapy may be helpful